Saturday, July 6, 2013

Bits and Pieces # 17: I’m Walkin’ On the Bad Side.


I.

Is There Anybody Wantin’ to Walk With Me?

                In addition to the extremely nerdy goal of getting as many platinum trophies as possible over the course of the summer – which is really just an excuse to keep me writing in the blog so that I’m always writing something, but I’m failing at that currently – I had another goal.  This one is far more important and a lot less nerdy.  It’s this: to get as many short horror stories written as I possibly can between June 1st and September 30th.  I’m also failing at that as far as actual words written go, but there’s a lot boiling around in my brainmeat like pork in a crock pot kept at the lowest setting.  And it’s dark and vile and horrible things that are going around in my head.  I’m trying to write the most horrific and horrible, grotesque and vile, and disgusting and violent short stories I possibly can.  This is something I’ve attempted on several occasions throughout the years and has come to fruition on a handful of occasions, but not much more than that.  I’ve two little gems that I’m quite fond of that I haven’t really shared with a whole lot of people, but I’m getting there.  It’ll happen soon.  In addition to those short stories, I’m also making another attempt at a novel that I had shelved a while back because it wasn’t what I wanted it to be.  It kept going in directions that I wasn’t interested in exploring, but I guess that’s part of the game.

                Then there’s another project that I’m taking up that has an actual deadline.  I LOVE deadlines.  I freak out and stress out under deadlines, but remain entirely focused and – so far – I always pull it off without fail.  Even if it’s just silly deadlines like doing shit for fun, but with serious stuff, too.  I’ve written things for people that they needed written – letters of recommendation and such – in very little to no time at all, and they weren’t bad by any means.

                The deadline is, funnily enough, September 30th.  Del Howison and Joseph Nassie are doing an anthology based around Clive Barker’s Nightbreed/Cabal property and has opened up submissions for a lot of folk to send in their work for a chance to be paid and published.  The word limit is 5,000 which is about average for a short story, and it’s not as easy as you’d think.  To contain an entire story – beginning, middle, and end – into a word limit like that can be very difficult at times.  I’ve got a good chunk of it written already in my head with very bleak and horrible images to go along with certain phrases and lines, but I’m trying to read CABAL before I commit anything to paper.  That way the world of the Nightbreed is firmly planted in my head with all its awful seeds so the ideas can sprout to make horribly beautiful monsters.

                This goal is actually realistic and will be completed within the next few weeks.  The story seems to be coming easily enough not only because I’m very familiar with the work it revolves around – I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen all three of Clive Barker’s films, to be honest – but because I’m very familiar with the themes of CABAL as well in my personal life.

                The other goals aren’t so realistic and are just personal hyperbole.  I’m gonna try to get them done, but I’m not sure I’m really all that up to these personal challenges or if I’ll have the time to complete them.  Especially the novel.  I would love to have it completed before the Salt Lake City ComiCon that’s running through September 5th – 7th, because I have ideas revolving around then.  But, I probably won’t get it finished by then.  At least the t-shirt idea could still happen, if I can find a way to get the t-shirts done up – which means getting a working design around the concept of the novel that looks GOOD on a fucking t-shirt, which I’m not so sure can happen – that would help with the promotion of the book.  Or so I would hope!  At least I hope to be wearing a shirt for the novel at the convention.  ‘Cause I gotta push my stuff, y’know?  Ain’t no Vince McMahon behind me pushing me to superstar status or anything.  It’s all me.

                So, yeah, I’ve a lot of words to write, which is only part of the whole writing process, but it’s the most important part and the part that gets you paid for doing it.  AND PEOPLE WONDER WHY I DON’T WANNA BE SOCIAL ALL THE GODFUCKING TIME.  I got stuff to do, goals to achieve, and dreams to live, you fucks.  I’m pretty close to cutting most everyone off.  Oh, wait.  I already did that.  Family, Katie, and Alexis is all I’m really social with anymore.  Haha.  WRITE.

II.

Unstable

                I can always tell when I’m primed for writing.  It’s a weird little experience that I’m not too proud to admit to, but I’m gonna do it anyways ‘cause I really ain’t got nothing to hide.  Normally, when writing is the furthest from my brain – I say normally because with all the shit that’s been going on since 2008, writing hasn’t been a priority and that’s sad! – I’m kind of a cold, emotionless bastard that hates everyone and everything except video games, comic books, and action figures.  Nerd at heart, demon at the helm.  My emotions go wonky as fuck when writing is the main priority.  I’m talking like seeing the cheesiest scene in the cheesiest movie, and all of a sudden I’m a whimpering mess.  It’s instability, I know that.  I’m about as emotionally stable as a stack of feathers.  I’ll be fine one minute and then the next I’m a quietly raging atomic bomb wishing horrible death on cuddly critters or some shit.  But it’s somewhat embarrassing to watch some movie that’s got as many cheap pops in its story telling dynamic as a Mick Foley promo, and my eyes become sprinklers and my face cringes into the same expression that I have when I eat a fucking sour patch kid.

                But it’s an indicator, to me at least.  It means to me that not only am I emotionally unstable as fuck all, but that I’m in tune with my emotions in a way that a reader should be when they open a book and subject themselves to whatever dramas or atrocities the author has in mind.  Of course, in my case, it takes me to places that make me really want to try to frighten the absolute fuck out of anyone that may read anything I write.  Yet, it’s still frustrating when it happens.

III

Watch and a Chain and its so Plat, Y’know

                Because of the obligations above and a revamped video game schedule, the Summer of Platinum has been delayed a great deal.  Aw, sad!  I know.  But it was bound to happen.  I’m feeling better than I have since I hurt my back in 2008, and the refocus on writing is so much more welcome than anything else that’s going on in my life.  That doesn’t mean it’s over, however!  ‘Cause I really do need to be writing every day as much as possible, it’s just delayed.  I have one almost half-written about the most recent game I’ve platinumed, but I’m waiting on a friend to supply me her statistics in the game so I have a comparison model to base my performance on – she’s the only other person I know that’s platinumed this game.

                But in order to make sure I get my money’s worth out of all the games I’ve bought, I need to insure that I’m actually playing this games.  So I made a schedule by which I’m playing them with, starting from their original publication dates, so it’s going to be a long while before I get to any of the games that I’m close to platinuming.  I’m currently on Mortal Kombat II, which is dated in 1992 or 1993, if that gives anyone a frame of reference.


                Yay, writing!

No comments:

Post a Comment